Jersey Writers at NJ.com Features The Other Mother: Maureen Berzok of Jersey Writers ( NJ.com) says:"Well, has this one [The Other Mother] caught your interest yet? The predicament of the working mom who sacrifices time with her kid to provide for her kid. Top that with putting another woman in the house! Fires, dead animals, 'his arm,' Lyndhurst. Now there's New Jersey for you."
A new study finds a growing divide between attitudes of stay-at-home and working moms, while several recent articles claim that the mommy wars do not exist.
The tensions between stay at home and working moms are growing according to a new research study. This Pew Research survey finds that there is more disagreement now than ten years ago among moms about whether it is better to be a stay at home mom or a working mom.
Asking mothers about their views on raising children, a 2007 Pew study about motherhood finds that “A 44% plurality of at-home moms consider the increase in working mothers bad for society while about half as many say it is good for society and the remainder take a neutral position. By contrast, working moms are split almost evenly between positive, negative, and neutral views of how this trend is affecting society. … the opinion divide on this question between at home and working moms has emerged over the past decade.
A number of books discuss of the roles of moms and the delicate balancing of work and family. These include: Mommy Wars: Stay-at-Home and Career Moms Face Off on Their Choices, Their Lives, Their Families by Leslie Morgan Steiner; The Truth Behind the "Mommy Wars": Who Decides What Makes a Good Mother? by Miriam Peskowitz; and To Hell with All That: Loving and Loathing Our Inner Housewife by Caitlin Flanagan. A new novel - The Other Mother by Gwendolen Gross - explores the challenges of modern motherhood from perspective of an at-home and career mom.
Taking the opposite view from the Pew study on moms opinions about motherhood, several recent articles claim that the mommy wars is a marketing concept, not a real conflict between working moms and stay at home moms.
A recent Washington Post article titled “The Mommy War Machine,” E.J. Graff says: “But I've got news for you: This is a war that isn't. The ballyhooed Mommy Wars exist mainly in the minds -- and the marketing machines -- of the media and publishing industry, which have been churning out mom vs. mom news flashes since, believe it or not, the 1950s. All while the number of working mothers has been rising.”
Susan Faludi views the war of the mommies as a distraction from the fundamental issue of equality between women and men and faced by moms who stay at home versus moms who work.
In her recent piece, “Pitting Women Against Each Other,” she explains: “Since the late ‘90s, and thanks in large measure to the steering influence of the media, the national “debate” on women has centered on content-free blatherings about Monica and the bad behavior of a host of interchangeable celebrity “girls,” false battles over “Mommy Wars,” disingenuous musings on breast implants and botox as opportunities for enhanced female “self-esteem,” and ephemeral pop-culture “trends” on whether, say, “Knocked Up” heralds the dawn of the “beta male.” This is all very far from the essential question of feminism: how do we remake society (not just give women the equal opportunity to max out their credit cards and be crushed by debt) so that women and men will be truly equal and full citizens, full agents not just in their personal lives but in their responsibilities to a public world?”
Nanette Fondas says in a Huffington Post article “A Peaceful Revolution: What Do Mothers Want? Presidential Candidates Take Notice!,” “American moms wish their lives were portrayed accurately by the media, with interest and nuance, not a bias toward "mommy wars.'' None of the working mothers I interviewed were critical of moms who stay home to care for children: Everyone wanted more time with their loved ones. None of the at-home moms derided mothers who go to work for pay. They recognized it as an economic necessity and often an emotional one. None expressed much angst about opting out of a big, promising career, because most had no such choice.”
Despite the common motherhood issues faced by all moms, communication differences may be a source of much of the strain between moms who work and moms that stay at home. In fact, many mothers do not fall clearly into either camp and find a work and family balance somewhere in between full time at work and full time at home. Perhaps, more attention in the future will be paid towards bridging this gap and finding a way towards mutual understanding.
Today's featured book review of The Other Mother: A Novel by Gwendolen Gross is from the mom blog "My Life As It Is."
“I’m speechless. I have too much to say. I don’t know what to say. I don’t know where to begin. But there is so much to say. The book [The Other Mother] was amazing. ... As the story continues we truly get to know both Moms. OMG – I loved them both. I hated them both. I wanted to hug them both. I wanted to shake them both. I wanted to crawl into the pages and bang THEIR heads together. There was so much of ME in both of them.”
— My Life As It Is
To read the full book review of this new motherhood novel, visit the mom blog: My Life As It Is.
Are you looking for the latest news stories with information that matters to moms? Here are two top websites from MSNBC and Yahoo with breaking news for moms dealing with parenting issues, children’s health, pregnancy, babies, and more.
Recommended motherhood news website: MSNBC Kids and Parenting News
On the MSNBC Parenting and Kids News website, breaking news that matters to moms is updated around the clock. MSNBC Parenting and Kids News includes up to the minute motherhood, parenting, and family news articles from MSNBC, the Associated Press, and Reuters.
What can moms do at MSNBC Kids and Parenting?
Recent news for moms reported on MSNBC Kids and Parenting News:
Recommended motherhood news website: Yahoo Parenting and Kids News
On the Yahoo Parenting and Kids News website, the latest new stories on parenting issues, children’s health, pregnancy, babies, and more are continuously updated. Parenting and Kids News from Yahoo publishes current news articles from top international sources including Associated Press, Reuters News, Reuters Health News, HealthDay News, and Agence France-Presse.
What can moms do at Yahoo Parenting and Kids?
Recent news for moms reported on Yahoo Parenting and Kids News
Just announced today, Amazon is introducing the new portable wireless reader called Kindle. And, The Other Mother: A Novel by Gwendolen Gross is available as a Kindle Book (E-book) that can be downloaded in under one minute and is priced at $9.99.
According to Amazon, "Three years ago, we set out to design and build an entirely new class of device—a convenient, portable reading device with the ability to wirelessly download books, blogs, magazines, and newspapers. The result is Amazon Kindle."
There are more than 88,000 Kindle books available. In addition, there are Kindle versions major U.S. and international newpapers and magazines such as Time and Forbes. You can read reviews of Kindle here.
USA Today - in the Mommy Lit Book Roundup - reviews The Other Mother saying “The Other Mother belongs in a new fiction genre: mommy-war lit. Mothers of infants through the kindergarten set will find it compelling — be they stay-at-home mothers or working.”
“Author Gwendolen Gross' best insights are into how the two women's own childhoods and moms have shaped their choices. And how motherhood seems to trigger a biological urge to judge other females.”
"I LOVED this book [The Other Mother]. For me, the best part of this book was the look inside the stay at home mom's house. Since I work full time and always have, I have no idea what it would be like to be a stay at home mom. This book gave me a glimpse into this life."
In a recent interview, The Metropolitan Mama (Stephanie) chats with Gwendolen Gross. Take a look at the full interview here.
One question Stephanie asks Gwendolen is about tips for aspiring writers. Gwendolen replies:
“Writers are people who write. The whole business bit is separate and comes later. Write every day, even if the only time you have is in the school parking lot waiting for your kids. Give yourself permission to find your way, to write until you get to the truths you want to tell.”
Also, Stephanie is offering a random drawing for a free, signed copy of The Other Mother. To enter, leave a comment and your e-mail address by Thursday, November 15, at midnight on the Metropolitan Mama website here:
http://metropolitanmama.blogspot.com/2007/11/meet-author-gwendolen-gross.html
The winner will be announced and contacted by e-mail on Friday, November 16.
A group of Mommy bloggers started an online book club this week-- and they've chosen a book by a New Jersey author and fellow blogger as their first subject.
Gross, the author, lives in North Jersey and has a rather interesting blog herself. Her site -- The Other Mother - for Moms Who Want to Write -- is a blog/online workshop for aspiring writers.
Inspired by the release of the new motherhood novel "The Other Mother," contributors to the Silicon Valley, Chicago, Washington DC Metro, and New York City Moms Blogs are currently engaging in an intense discussion about balancing work and family.
In many of the comments on the Chicago Moms Blog, moms relate their own lives to the main characters in the novel: Thea (the stay-at-home mom) and Amanda (the working mom). Moms are exploring the question of how we allow and trust other people to care for our children.
Jill Asher writes on the Chicago Moms Blog, “I could totally relate to both Thea and Amanda. At some points in the book, I kept yelling (to myself)... just talk to each other! Get your issues out on the table and you will both feel a lot better. At other parts, I wanted to give them each a big hug and tell them that they were doing a great job as a mom.”
Gwendolen Gross, the author of The Other Mother, comments, “I wrote this novel with one narrator who is a stay-at-home mom and the other a working mom to accomplish something I thought non-fiction couldn't. What I wanted was to be able to stand in shoes of both moms, in hopes of illustrating how we judge each other unnecessarily, and understanding, myself, how important it is to respect other people's methods and choices even if they don't match my own.”
The discussion continues and all blog readers are invited to participate on the Chicago Moms Blog.
The four Moms Blogs are the brainchild of Jill Asher and Pamela Miller Hornik, and they have received national media attention for their coverage of parenting issues in the New York Times, Wall Street Journal, Washington Post, San Jose Mercury News, Los Angeles Times, Chicago Sun Times and on ABC News.
Mom blogs across the country are writing about how the new motherhood novel - The Other Mother - explores the joys and struggles of motherhood. Mom reviewers describe how this suspenseful novel inspires them to think deeply about their own choices in balancing work and family, as well as their judgments about decisions made by other mothers.
Gwendolen Gross, the author of The Other Mother, shares her thoughts saying, "I wrote this novel with one narrator who is a stay-at-home mom and the other a working mom to accomplish something I thought non-fiction couldn't. What I wanted was to be able to stand in shoes of both moms, in hopes of illustrating how we judge each other unnecessarily, and understanding, myself, how important it is to respect other people's methods and choices even if they don't match my own."
In recent reviews, moms tell how they relate closely to both mothers in the novel. The Mom Blog My Life As It Is writes, "As the story continues we truly get to know both Moms. OMG – I loved them both. I hated them both. I wanted to hug them both. I wanted to shake them both. I wanted to crawl into the pages and bang THEIR heads together. There was so much of ME in both of them." Jill Asher writes on the Chicago Moms Blog, "I could totally relate to both Thea and Amanda. At some points in the book, I kept yelling (to myself)... just talk to each other! Get your issues out on the table and you will both feel a lot better. At other parts, I wanted to give them each a big hug and tell them that they were doing a great job as a mom."
The balanced portrayal of the challenges of motherhood for both stay at home and working moms is noted in many reviews. Super-Mommy Blog says, "This book really touches on some of the deepest issues that come with motherhood, and no matter what side you belong to, you can really get a feel for the other side’s life." According to Work It: A Blog For Working Moms, The Other Mother "displays with pinpoint accuracy the challenges for both stay-at-home moms and working moms - and the delicate balance that all women face on a daily basis." Go-Go Mommy says "The Other Mother clearly illustrates the self-doubt that is a part of parenthood, the firm convictions that we carry with us - be they right or wrong, and the special treat of being able to really see issues from a perspective other than our own."
Mom reviewers are also talking about the deep emotional impact of Ms. Gross’ novel. The Mom Blog Reviews From the Couch says, "Some experiences in the book led me to tears. I cried because it hit too close to home. It is difficult to not have the power, trust, or heart to stick up for one’s choices, and then nearly have a heart-attack of fear and regret when one finally does. I can understand being simultaneously brave and cowardly." Along the same lines, The Mom Gadget Blog writes "the characters are so believable and are sure to leave a lasting impression, long after the final page has been turned. While I can’t tell you how the book ends, I will tell you that it’s the first time I’ve ever had to reach for the box of tissue while reading a book."
Working Moms Against Guilt sums up her thoughts, "What I really like about this book is how the characters experience doubts and emotions that every mother experiences. Though Thea and Amanda fixate on one another, the real conflict lies within themselves. In the end, this book isn't about The Other Mother, it's about being a mother in general." Karianna - Reviews From the Couch also writes "The Other Mother is enjoyable, thought-provoking, and definitely an excellent book club book because not every woman will read it the same way. It is bound to create lots of heavy discussion and introspection."
Gwendolen Gross, author of the recently released novel The Other Mother, is featured in the October 24, 2007 edition of Chronicle Telegram newspaper of Lorain County, Ohio.
In this article by Cindy Leise, Ms. Gross describes her experiences at Oberlin College, in the publishing industry, and as a writer.
Here is the article link to the Chronicle Telegram piece: "Oberlin grad a hit in literary world"): http://www.chroniclet.com/2007/10/24/oberlin-grad-a-hit-in-literary-world/
In an event described as "following in the footsteps of our beloved Oprah," contributors from the Silicon Valley Moms Blog, New York City Moms Blog, Chicago Moms Blog, and the Washington DC Metro Moms Blog are reading the new suspenseful 
motherhood novel The Other Mother by Gwendolen Gross. Starting on Monday, October 29, they begin their first-ever online collective book club meeting to discuss this novel, which has been described by Booklist as "an electrifyingly complex and explosively gripping portrait of contemporary, have-it-all motherhood."
Gross' novel encourages an active dialogue between moms, because it inspires mothers to explore their own choices about balancing work and family, the struggles and joys of parenting, and the constant push and pull of contemporary motherhood. Publisher's Weekly says that The Other Mother "documents the front lines of the Mommy Wars, but its real strength lies is exposing the complex inner battlefields motherhood can open up." National Public Radio calls The Other Mother "a thoughtful, multi-faceted look at what divides and unites mothers."
These four Moms Blogs are inviting all blog readers to "read along if you like and join us for a lively book club discussion." The Moms Blogs are the brainchild of Jill Asher and Pamela Miller Hornik, and they have received national media attention for their coverage of parenting issues in the New York Times, Wall Street Journal, Washington Post, San Jose Mercury News, Los Angeles Times, Chicago Sun Times and on ABC News.
The Other Mother has been featured in the New York Daily News, the Toronto Star, Redbook, OK! Magazine, and on National Public Radio, and it is the selection of four national book clubs.
The Mom Gadget Blog says that The Other Mother "captures the truest most vulnerable times any mother has experienced, as one mother struggles with the fact that all her kids will soon be attending school -- while the other struggles with returning to work with a newborn at home ... The characters are so believable and are sure to leave a lasting impression, long after the final page has been turned." The Other Mother by Gwendolen Gross is available at Amazon and in bookstores.
Don't Forget Mother's Day ~ May 11,
2008
Give Mom the Perfect Gift ~
The Other Mother: A Novel
